I just want to Cry....and feel like I want to die....

I just feel like total crap......

Poker....I am not sure if I just sucked today....if the fish got lucky.....

To be honest I dont have a clue if I played great, good, average, fair, poor, bad or crappy.

the Red numbers in poker tracker mean I lost several buyins.

I really just want to cry......I lost more in a day last week, and felt 20 times better....
I played worse 2 days ago and I feel worse than I did then (and I know I didnt play as bad as that day.....

this is my day in a nutshell....

I have a set of 3s on the flop...
Bet for value.....
Bet for Value....
River is some card that cant hit any range.....say....4 of diamonds...
Bet for Value....
The stupidest villian on the planet min raises.......
I replay the hand in my head.....No resistance...just call station....Raggedy board....
I thought he had a pair....K4? 94?......
I bet 3 streets, is he stupid enough to think bottom 2 pair is good.

He called all the way down with 44.....K937 board (note:I potted it EVERY STREET)

and then there are the hands I push, and dont even think before I do.....

I really just want to cry......
I hate this......

I'm not sure if its bad beats, or my own stupidity.

I know I got floated alot today......

ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Combine that with being lonely.......
Craig's not a very happy camper....

I wish I was more sociable....
I wish people weren't such liars.....(LOL...especially friends and partners)

I definatley need to get out....I am going to have to force myself to goto the Thunderbirds game tommorrow.

I feel so pathetic going to everything alone though.

I wish I wasnt me.